A Family Responds to the Death, at a Young Age, of a Husband & Father
World War II was won by the incredible sacrifices made by so many citizens of the United States and its allies. Each of the three sons of Lena and Nathan Lubin served in the military during this difficult time of sacrifice.
Irving and Bess Lubin
One of Lena and Nathan’s sons, Irving, returned from fighting in Europe after the war ended in 1945. Not long after coming back to the states, Irv traveled to Louisville to marry his fiancé Bessie Rozen. Lena and Nathan’s five children were very close. Irv’s youngest sister, Millie, traveled across the country with her boy-friend, Joey Baker, to be at this wedding in Kentucky and to be with other family members.
And, the day after the wedding of Irv and Bess, a second and unplanned wedding took place in Louisville. With close family already gathered and some from great distances, Millie and Joey made the decision that they also wanted to spend their lives together. Bess not only planned and organized her wedding, but she assisted Millie and Joey in putting a second wedding together that took place the next day.
Irv and Bess spent the next decade raising their two children, Alan and Sandy, and running a small business that paid the bills.
In the late 1950s and early 1960s, Irv suffered a series of heart attacks that resulted in him being bed ridden for long periods of time. And at the too young age of 45, Irv lost his battle with coronary disease.
The long period of caring for husband Irv, the death of the love of Bess’ life, the ending of the small business that had paid the bills, and faced with raising two sons 11 and 12 years old by herself presented overwhelming pressures for Bess.
The Blessing of being part of a Close and Caring Family
Experiencing a long period of health issues faced by a bed-ridden father and then losing that parent at a very young age significantly impacted two children aged 11 and 12.
Very soon after Irv’s passing, the patriarch of the family at that time, Herman Lubin, met with both Alan and Sandy and in his soft, steady, and assuring voice made it clear that anything that the two siblings needed would be provided. And, his and Helen’s home would always be a place of comfort and caring. Cousins Harold, Stevie, and Leonard were an important part of that support.
A father was lost, but Herman and Helen and their children made sure that very special support was being put in place.
And soon after meeting with Herman and Helen, Milton and Esther Lubin had the two siblings over to their home. Milton and Esther stated very clearly, “You will both be treated no differently than we treat our children.” Growing up, cousins Sheila, Nathan, Avery, Minda, and Diane were like siblings to Alan and Sandy.
One of so many examples of Milton and Esther’s caring follows. Eleven years after Milton and Esther met with the two siblings following their father’s death, Sandy graduated from college in Virginia. Milton felt that it was important for him to be at this event, just as he attended graduations for his own children. Unfortunately, he was scheduled on duty at his West Memphis, Arkansas hospital that weekend and advised that while Esther would be attending, he was regrettably unable to make it to this graduation.
The day before the graduation, Milton called Sandy to let him know that he had chartered an airplane that would leave immediately after he finished his hospital rounds. Milton flew from the small airport in West Memphis, Arkansas to Charlottesville, Virginia in time for the graduation.
A father had been lost by both siblings, but Milton and Esther and their children made sure that very special support was put in place.
Bess needed time to Recover
Irv’s death was devastating to Bess. And the pressures that she faced were significant. It was critical that she have a break.
After Irv’s death and after the school year ended, Bess scheduled an extended trip out of the country for several months that took her around the world. It was a critical break that allowed her time to manage her loss and grief.
Before learning about the planned international travel, Sandy received a phone call from Aunt Millie Baker. She invited him to be a part of their family for the summer that included a room in her home in Los Angeles, the use of their second home on the beach in Malibu, and time together with first cousins Norm, Jan, and Don.
During this time together in California, Millie and Joey made it clear that if there was ever anything that the two nephews needed, they would always be there. And Sandy’s first cousins treated him like a sibling during a summer that was full of fun.
One of so many examples follows of Millie and Joey’s caring. Sandy and future wife Kay dated for 9 years (as a result of his allergy to cats, his inability to breath when Kay’s Theo was nearby, and Kay’s love for this very large and special feline).
Millie advised that this courtship was taking entirely too long and that the family had already decided that Kay was a “keeper.” Millie also shared that she would be sending a wedding ring to Kay, and the only issue was if the family would be keeping Sandy.
Millie was soon advised that a ring had already been purchased and a wedding was on the horizon.
A father was lost, but Millie and Joey and their children made sure that both siblings knew that family support would always be there.
There were so many acts done by so many members of the family that delivered the same message of truly incredible support.
A father was lost at an early age, but an entire extended family made certain that extra special love and caring was in place.
It is an incredible blessing to be a part of such a Close and Wonderful family–